Whose Cancer is It?

Here is one of the toughest things about cancer and caregiving—whose cancer is it? And who bears the consequences? Yes, I know it’s really his. It’s his body after all. But, here’s an example: He’s in pain. I hand him the phone. He won’t call the doc. I find a specialist. He won’t ask. I say, “Try this.” He says, “Later”. He doesn’t sleep. So neither do I.

Yes, he is the person with cancer but do I get a vote?

I don't want to be part of the cancer conspiracy. I wait too long to say, “That pain could be related to your cancer.” But when are decisions around his cancer only his? When are they mine --or ours? His denial impacts  my sleep, work, activities, and life. So whose cancer is it?

Talk about a valiant battle with cancer.

 Grrrrrrrr.

(Yes, I am afraid.)