Chemo Feet

The other day I was telling a friend about John's feet and the care that he takes with balance especially upon waking. This is another late gift from the colon cancer chemical regimen 5FU. And FU it is! That's the good news/bad news leftover: peripheral neuropathy. 

It's one of those things that people don't like to complain about in CancerLand. I mean, it's kinda bad form: you're alive, you're not on fire, there's no new surgery coming...so you have numb feet. But it's more than that. People with Diabetes understand. They know the consequences if you can't feel your feet--balance is shot, sports are limited and you have to look down to see if you are cut or burned or hurt.

But today I found this great article about Chemo Feet by Susan Gubar who wrote so beautifully about her ovarian cancer last year.

Here's the link. Take a look at what she has to say about neuropathy and losing touch with her feet:

http://well.blogs.nytimes.com/2013/01/03/living-with-cancer-chemo-feet/?smid=pl-share

The agony of da feet

Chemo now officially over. Jeanette, our favorite nurse, came this afternoon and unhooked the infusion pump. 5-FU is gone at last. Now the feet, the feet. They are numb. Numb doesn’t sound like much until you realize that we use the nerves on the bottom of our feet to walk, stand, balance and to know where we are in space. Most of our spacial orientation comes from nerve messages from our feet. It can take a year or more for this to improve. The party line is that somewhere between 20 and 80 percent of the neuropathy is for keeps. The gift that chemo keeps on giving.

Love and Buttons

It’s chemo day again. Number eleven. Feels like it came fast this time. Neuropathy continues and may be accelerating. The Oxalyplatin is gone but now I know that the nerve damage is just that, damage. I read all about it online. Scary prospects. Hands and feet. Will he play the piano again? Play golf again? Be able to drive if the damage doesn’t slow down? And the other things that he does with these hands, these precious sensitive hands? Again, Cancerland is blind to sex. They talk about being able to button buttons but what about being able to create pleasure? What would upset you more: buying pullover shirts or giving up sex?