The other thing that hit home listening to this talk was her characterization of the erotic as opposite of death or trauma. We know that cancer is a trauma and cancer is death--whether one's diagnosis is terminal or not cancer simply brings death closer to both partners in a relationship. It could be that the emotional proximity of death is as much a cause of a waning sex life as the physical side effects that come with cancer. But it's also possible, I think, to channel that death charge--it's energy after all-- into a powerful erotic charge to bring great sex back.
I invite you to spend 20 minutes watching Perel's talk using the link below.