It’s a question you might hear in Cancer Land. It might be
sobbed or yelled or most often whispered.
Is a cancer diagnosis God’s will? How do we know what’s
God’s will is?
Part of the wisdom in Alcoholics Anonymous says that, “God’s
will is what is.” That cryptic comment is often expanded by this injunction to
see God’s will: “Leave your house in the morning and start walking, when you
hit a wall turn left. Keep going and when you hit a wall, turn left.”
Another way of discerning God’s will that I like and that I
try to remember is this: “Get up each day and leave your house. When you come
to a door that opens easily go through it and when you come to a door that
doesn’t open or that you might shove or lean your shoulder against, don’t go
through that one.”
I like that last description because I have shoved my way
through so many doors (relationships, jobs, hairstyles) that I regretted later,
when the saner, healthier (God’s will) (relationship, job, hairstyle) was just
over there.
But cancer is hard to discern this way. It’s a very hard
door. Does shoving against cancer mean fighting it like mad with every surgery,
treatment and chemical? Or are the traditional protocols the “easy” and
acceptable way? Is it harder to say no to chemo or surgery or opinions?
Can cancer be a curative as well as cured? Can it be a door
to go through of itself? Marion Woodman in her cancer journal, “Bone” shows how
cancer became her therapist and a healer of other injuries in her life. Is that
doing it the hard way as well? Or is that secondary healing and secondary gain
some of God’s will too?
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